Or rather Wasps in this case, you know, the great big
UGLY ones with the extra long hind legs...
This story actually begins a week and change ago. Last time I was out chasing sockeye in the Inlet, the main engine on the little whaler "
hiccuped" a couple times before settling into her usual purr.
Plug replacement is overdue I recall thinking...
So, that same day I ran down and purchased a set of the expensive ones, the no-gap technological wonder that costs and arm and a leg, but keep going and going rather reminiscent of the
Energizer Bunny. A quick install, another quick run through and cleaning of all the filters, and
Good To Go... or so I thought. As this little 50 has always been a strong performer, I didn't bother to flash it up, and felt confident all was well and ready for the next run...
Jump forward to yesterday. A couple of Buddies expressing interest in a sockeye foray, and me strangely enough with a little time on my hands to accommodate. Excellent! After performing a few menial tasks from the
Honey-Do list, I decided to run the old gal in the driveway, just to ensure all was as expected...
Hooked up the muffs, and hit the key. First thing I noticed was that she was being right resistant to the start? Huh? Second thing I noticed was a strange humming noise coming from somewhere near my toes?? What?
Glancing down, I instantly saw the source. A rather large wasp nest was being formed inside the center console, basically now about a foot from my toes! And, the vibration of turning her over had all the occupants a tad disturbed, and looking for blood!
My Blood!
EEEK!!!!! 
A well orchestrated leap sent me tumbling my friend over teakettle out of the boat and onto the front lawn. Ducking angry bombers, I finally reached the hose, and cranked the Jet function up to High Power. Now well armed, I turned with an evil grin, and directed the blast of high pressure directly into the nest, literally tearing it apart at the seams and scattering PO'd wasps all over the deck! Sweet! This combat lasted near ten minutes, at which time I thanked my lucky stars I hadn't been stung, and that the majority of my opposition were now draining out through the plug hole!
Back to the matter at hand, I climbed back aboard, and hit the key again. This time she struggled into life, but certainly wasn't sounding like her usual self. Suddenly another wave of the wasps appeared, buzzing angrily around my head? Huh? Off to the house to collect the electric fly swatter! After nuking 6 or 7, I realized there was another smaller nest, nestled inside the sounder mount. Sneaky Buggers. Another rip with the hose, and nest number 2 bites the dust. The next hour and change was spent alternating between the now mandatory engine check, and swatting returning wasps with the hand held zapper. BTW, you
GOTTA have one of these! When you nail any of the flying nuisances, it makes a most satisfying
ZAP, complete with sparks and bug guts flying everywhere!
After taking down a little better than 20 of the crazed monsters, I finally came to the conclusion that 2 of 4 cylinders were not getting any spark.
Hmmmm. Guess the coils failed, but I best leave that to the Pros (I am after all a simple pilot, and little rehearsed in proper ground crew mechanics...)
A quick call after hours to one of the valley's best marine mechanics.
Nope, backed up a week he says, before asking who I was. After I explained that part, and the problem, he suggested he could make a little wiggle room about 10ish this am. Good! So to be early and ensure I could get her looked at today, I was backing the truck up to engage the hitch well before 9:30.
The Missuz did an excellent job of guiding the truck to the hitch, then stood aside as I lowered the hitch itself onto the ball. Upon contact, a most angry
BUZZ, and a handful of wasps came screaming out from under the ball?!
EEEK again!
Must have been yet another nest up inside the hitch, now well squished by the contact with the ball. This time I was not so fortunate, and a large black and yellow flying tiger seized my knee and began to practise it's own version of acupuncture!!
EEEEEOOOOOWWWW! *@#&*!
MAN that
STINGS! 
An interesting version of something between ballet and mad rock dancing ensued on the front lawn as I vainly attempted to dispatch the offender and ward off its comrades. The Biter got away despite my best efforts, but by swift action (running and screaming like a schoolgirl that is) I managed to neatly avoid any further inflictions of searing pain.
So, with a rapidly swelling and quite painful knee, I drug the boat down to the
Sawbones. Upon further discussion (he knows this engine) he afforded that it likely a small problem, and suggested if that was the case, she would be (hopefully) ready later this afternoon. The drive home was interesting. Funny thing attempting to drive when the foot on the gas pedal is being run by a knee now swollen to near mammoth proportions, and literally screaming with each flex!
But I somehow managed to make it.
Seem to have somehow forgotten to give the mechanic a head's up regarding the wasps, but then again, I do believe they are all gone now, and anyway, I
NEED that boat this afternoon...
Now, I am sitting back, knee elevated and the pain starting to dwindle. Hoping beyond hope that the issue with the boat is small, and she is once again ready to hunt so effectively as she does later today.
The morale here: Check your rig if she's been sitting even but a little time. The nests that were built came along within the space of but a few days. And I can just imagine the frenzied activity on the water had those nests not been located and taken down on dry land! Scary thought that...
Cheers,
Nog -
The Wounded
Author
Topic: Of Boats and Bees (Read 1880 times)